Some days I'm just not really up for being a member of society, I just want to stay at home and meh...
I don't get out of my pj's unless it's a hot day and excessive swear requires a freshen up. I get the kids their breakfast which involves a lot of deep thought and frustrated discussion, the birthday theif has decided one of our cupboards is called "The Something to Eat Cupboard" and she insists on that being opened and it's contents rummaged through before she settles for whatever cereal or toast her brother has chosen.
And then I lay down on the lounge.
Clothes need to be put on and usually Mudda needs to tickle her little pair of pickleheads because the sound of their laughter makes me feel so good inside.
Then I lay down on the lounge.
Snacks are required and again this involves "The Something to Eat Cupboard" and making the choice between biscuits and chips and fruit can be a considerably long process.
Then I lay down on the lounge.
It's quite important that I witness the new move The Slayer has learned on his lego xbox game or even more important that I somehow work out how to defeat a lurking villian that he's so sure I can do but I can't seem to make him understand that he knows more about this particular game than I do (the only game I've really had a good crack at is GTA V and even then I mostly flooked it).
Now I can't lay because lunch is needed and again it's a debacle. I have already decided what it is they'll be eating but we still require the process to be the same as breakfast and snack times. We'll pop on a movie - we are limited, not by choice but by taste and so it's always one of a small few; The Labyrinth, Despicable Me 2, The Secret Life of Pets or Shrek.
Then I lay down.
Some kind of colouring or craft activity needs my absolute urgent attention, he's taken her pencil or she's using one that he wants even though she's got 5 pencils in her other hand and doesn't need the one he wants.
Then I lay.
Now they've moved to the front room and there's a disturbance, it always starts out with uncontrollable giggling but finishes with yelling and squealing and shouts of "Mumma, Mudda" and then "He just did this" or "Tell her not to do that" or "I'm not your best friend anymore."
Who knows how but I succeed in calming them and they're back to playing 'nicely'.
Down... Lounge...
Dinner time, The Slayer and his sister will run in and out of the kitchen. "Is dinner nearly ready?" "I don't want that" "Are you listening to a podcast?" "I just have ice cream" "Well done Mumma, I like that stuff"... "Eat your dinner please" "Just eat it, you know you get no dessert unless you eat it." "Do I have to call Santa Clause?"
Such a looooooooong process and no laying again just yet.
We still have bath's to be had, pjs to be put on, arguing about whether or not it's bedtime. Plenty of loving, plenty of kissies, plenty of hugs, plenty of last minute important questions, one last try at a cheeky snack, one sudden urgent poop to be done.
And finally I crawl into bed completely exhausted and unsure why? I stayed at home all day. I layed. My brain races incredibly at bedtime so I have popped a rain app on my phone. I love the cold, I love the rain. I need to pay close attention though to which session i listen to you see when I first put it on my phone I didn't realise that some of the little episodes feature thunder and in case you didn't know thunder is quite loud and sometimes rolls in completely out of the blue. My body would be calming, just floating off into possible sleep when a clap of thunder hits and my body jolts and I'm wide awake and then back to calming but at some point I'm contemplating the next bang so my body becomes tense before it hits and my brain starts to tell me why I'm exhausted on a lazy day. Each thing you do with the kids is done twice, two lot's of tickling etc and then i remind myself that I didn't send this email to that person or I didn't reply to that text or phone that person. I forgot that I needed this thing washed for the morning. Then I call myself all kinds of unpleasant things because when I fucked up as a kid that's what my "mother" would do - you are a stupid bitch, you are useless and so on.
Sleep finally comes as the sun starts to rise and it's perhaps two hours until I'm up again. The lazy day is followed by a full on day because I need to do all the things planned for that day as well as catch up on what I didn't do the day before.
Here's to lazy Mum's who are always getting shit done!
I don't get out of my pj's unless it's a hot day and excessive swear requires a freshen up. I get the kids their breakfast which involves a lot of deep thought and frustrated discussion, the birthday theif has decided one of our cupboards is called "The Something to Eat Cupboard" and she insists on that being opened and it's contents rummaged through before she settles for whatever cereal or toast her brother has chosen.
And then I lay down on the lounge.
Clothes need to be put on and usually Mudda needs to tickle her little pair of pickleheads because the sound of their laughter makes me feel so good inside.
Then I lay down on the lounge.
Snacks are required and again this involves "The Something to Eat Cupboard" and making the choice between biscuits and chips and fruit can be a considerably long process.
Then I lay down on the lounge.
It's quite important that I witness the new move The Slayer has learned on his lego xbox game or even more important that I somehow work out how to defeat a lurking villian that he's so sure I can do but I can't seem to make him understand that he knows more about this particular game than I do (the only game I've really had a good crack at is GTA V and even then I mostly flooked it).
Now I can't lay because lunch is needed and again it's a debacle. I have already decided what it is they'll be eating but we still require the process to be the same as breakfast and snack times. We'll pop on a movie - we are limited, not by choice but by taste and so it's always one of a small few; The Labyrinth, Despicable Me 2, The Secret Life of Pets or Shrek.
Then I lay down.
Some kind of colouring or craft activity needs my absolute urgent attention, he's taken her pencil or she's using one that he wants even though she's got 5 pencils in her other hand and doesn't need the one he wants.
Then I lay.
Now they've moved to the front room and there's a disturbance, it always starts out with uncontrollable giggling but finishes with yelling and squealing and shouts of "Mumma, Mudda" and then "He just did this" or "Tell her not to do that" or "I'm not your best friend anymore."
Who knows how but I succeed in calming them and they're back to playing 'nicely'.
Down... Lounge...
Dinner time, The Slayer and his sister will run in and out of the kitchen. "Is dinner nearly ready?" "I don't want that" "Are you listening to a podcast?" "I just have ice cream" "Well done Mumma, I like that stuff"... "Eat your dinner please" "Just eat it, you know you get no dessert unless you eat it." "Do I have to call Santa Clause?"
Such a looooooooong process and no laying again just yet.
We still have bath's to be had, pjs to be put on, arguing about whether or not it's bedtime. Plenty of loving, plenty of kissies, plenty of hugs, plenty of last minute important questions, one last try at a cheeky snack, one sudden urgent poop to be done.
And finally I crawl into bed completely exhausted and unsure why? I stayed at home all day. I layed. My brain races incredibly at bedtime so I have popped a rain app on my phone. I love the cold, I love the rain. I need to pay close attention though to which session i listen to you see when I first put it on my phone I didn't realise that some of the little episodes feature thunder and in case you didn't know thunder is quite loud and sometimes rolls in completely out of the blue. My body would be calming, just floating off into possible sleep when a clap of thunder hits and my body jolts and I'm wide awake and then back to calming but at some point I'm contemplating the next bang so my body becomes tense before it hits and my brain starts to tell me why I'm exhausted on a lazy day. Each thing you do with the kids is done twice, two lot's of tickling etc and then i remind myself that I didn't send this email to that person or I didn't reply to that text or phone that person. I forgot that I needed this thing washed for the morning. Then I call myself all kinds of unpleasant things because when I fucked up as a kid that's what my "mother" would do - you are a stupid bitch, you are useless and so on.
Sleep finally comes as the sun starts to rise and it's perhaps two hours until I'm up again. The lazy day is followed by a full on day because I need to do all the things planned for that day as well as catch up on what I didn't do the day before.
Here's to lazy Mum's who are always getting shit done!